I love the internet and large groups of unknown lesbians give mij anxiety-driven bitch face, so dating via the App store sounds like a fabulous idea to mij. Anything to avoid te person rejection/rejecting. Online dating is nothing fresh, and while some straight people might hesitate to postbode their personals on the internet for fear of stigma, almost every lezzie I know has at some point gone online to find lurve or at least lovemaking. It just makes sense, gay-dar has limitations, lesbo nights can feel far and feel inbetween, and meeting a female organically can feel unlikely spil a gay woman.
There’s no debating reality: lesbians are working with a far smaller potential dating pool than straight women, and (for reasons unknown to mij) there are far fewer sapphic geared events than events geared at gay masculines. We’re straight up less visible, and dating apps permit us to securely browse through damsels Wij KNOW like women. I can’t pretend making a profile doesn’t make mij self-concious, but I will say that it’s better to waterput yourself out there ter almost any way that to sit at huis, re-watching The L Word, waiting for Mrs. Ideal to bicycle through the doorheen.
Last week I created a dating profile on each of thesis sites, and rating apps geared (or accepting) of lesbians based on three criteria: style, amenities, and my individual practice.
Style: OkCupid’s color palette of pepto bismal pink and gender-normative blue isn’t the chicest choice, but it’s not ugly. Tone wise, OkCupid is continually upbeat with tongue te cheek terminology and a pleasant aura of “we don’t take this too gravely and neither should you.”
Amenities: Like all of thesis apps, getting beginning with OkCupid is quick and ordinary. All you need is an email address and a (hopefully charming) username and you’re reading to get creepin’. Regular members can filterzakje potentials based on a multiplicity of criteria, which permits you to personages your nipt spil broad or narrow spil you like. OkCupid has more features, filters, and functions than any other dating app I’ve toneel. Some of the best include:
a. Compatibility questions that permit you to see your “match %” with other users
b. joy quizzes galore so other people can pre-judge you
c. capability to search based on location, age, height, religion, smoking, drinking, drug use, wedren (ugh), etc
d. capability to sort potentials based on match %, last online, newest, etc so you’re not stuck looking at the same assortment
e. device to set “broadcast” so women ter your area can see you want to suspend out right away
f. Choice to not show up to straight people- this cuts way down on creepy straight dudes so blinded by their own delusional desperation they deny to believe “gay” means “not interested ter boys including you”
Practice: The fattest free dating app te America, OkCupid combines a broad array of filters, detailed profiles, and arguably the largest density of LGBTQ women to choose from. I, and most gay women I know, have at some point(s) used OkCupid to go upon date after awkward date te hopes of (maybe) meeting someone worth waxing sweet nothings upon. One downside of everyone being on OkCupid is everyone will know you are on OkCupid. This is particularly awkward when you click on an appealing profile only to find that profile is someone you know, who knows you, who will know you know they know you’re alone. No amount of horrified back clicking can un-visit an unfriendly acquaintance’s OkCupid profile.
Proceed with caution, but do proceed. I’ve heard some fine success stories from OkCupid, while I didn’t find anyone I desired to date on there, I did meet an admirable fresh friend.
Style: With it’s clean layout and modern typography, Tinder is forearms down the most aesthetically appealing app. Unluckily, form comes at the the price of function. Profiles are amazingly limited, and searching for matches is limited to spinning through pictures of every Tinder user who shares at least one similar “like” with you on facebook.
Amenities: Tinder is basically a spin book of people vaguely connected to you on Facebook. You spin through pictures and press “heart” if you like what you see and “x” if you don’t. Since Tinder sees mij ending up with a man, even tho’ the thought of ending up with a man makes mij internally scream, I spent 99% of the time pressing “x.” If you want to see more about someone, you can look at their very limited profile to see five pictures, a epistel summary of how chill they are, and what “likes” you share. I can’t imagine a less effective way of searching for my next gf/victim.
Practice: Tinder is the cyber-equivalent of standing on a street corner, pointing at passers by, and asking “What about that one? What about that one? What about that one? What about that one?” to determine your next date. I’ve read article upon enthusiastic article about Tinder being the fresh big thing, and I get the appeal: maybe the one for you is a friend of a friend, just waiting to be discovered.
Unluckily, Tinder operates under the oppressive, hetero-normative assumption that that person will be of the opposite lovemaking. Tinder matched mij with an terrific majority of almost 100% masculine matches, even tho’ I set my preference to “women.” When Tinder did match mij with a woman, there wasgoed no indication whatsoever whether that woman wasgoed gay or just also loved Mean Chicks. Evidently Tinder thinks gay women are just going through a phase, maybe working through some daddy issues, and all wij need to do is look at enough pictures of studs and we’ll talent an go back to our God-given place on the D.
Out of morbid curiosity, I created a Tinder account linked to one of my straight stud friends facebook, and verrassing verrassing: not a single picture of a man popped up. Not one. I sifted for so ages te hopes that maybe Tinder indeed does just treat all people spil if their sexual preference is identically irrelevant, it doesn’t. Tinder treats LGBTQ users spil 2nd class users because it views LGBTQ sexualities spil 2nd class sexualities, wij are not the vaandel and therefore not worthy of even the most basic of consideration. Tinder graciously permits LGBTQ women to sign up for their service, but don’t expect them to treat us spil anything other than straight. To Tinder, we’re clearly not worth the effort.
Virtually nothing offends mij, but being treated spil if my sexual orientation is irrelevant offends mij. An app only useful to straight people masquerading spil a LGBTQ friendly app offends mij. Tinder might be stylish and based on an essentially good idea (matching via friends of FB friends/similar interests), but this is 2013 and it is not ok to treat gay women like 2nd class users ter any setting or medium.
Style: Oh, Brenda. Brenda, Brenda, Brenda. It’s like you’re attempting NOT to turn mij on. Very first of all, who ter God’s name determined “Brenda” would be a good name for a dating application? Why not Gladys? Millicent? Helga? Why not just name the app “Gram Gram” and call it a day?
Te addition to sharing the name of unlikable female television characters everywhere, Brenda fights with style and utility. Underneath a depressing palate of cheap lavender and dreary congregación, Brenda does indeed seem like a sweet, well meaning application. I pity Brenda, I want Brenda take hier glasses off and expose that bangin’ figure, but I don’t want to fuck with Brenda. I wish I did but I don’t. I am way too shallow for Brenda.
Amenities: Brenda can boast the awesome honor of being the only sapphic dating app te the app store. Yay! I love this. I would like to waterput spil much distance inbetween access to my lady-bits and studs spil possible, even on the internet. Other features Brenda boasts include:
a. Effortless rechtstreeks messaging. IM like its 2005.
b. Filterzakje by age range and…. Well that’s it.
c. Geschreven self description area
d. Capacity to upload up to five pictures
Practice: One thing I love about Brenda is the chicks online. OkCupid can feel a little high schoolgebouw what with the “who visited whose profile” but Brenda users are friendly and didn’t hesitate at all to succesnummer mij up. I see so much potential here, but the webpagina needs a makeover and more filters/amenities to indeed be a competitor.
I cannot rate Dattch the lezzie dating app because I cannot download Dattch the sapphic dating app. I searched high and low te the app store but alas, Dattch eludes mij now spil much spil it eluded mij the day Trish told mij to download Dattch. Maybe it’s only for European lesbians? Whatever the reason, Dattch hella snubbed mij and I will not leave behind the insult. Even if they do have a super nice webstek.
So which app bodes best for women who like women? And the winner is…. OkCupid! OkCupid not only has far more lezzers, it has features for days, addictive quizes, in- depth profiles, and an amazingly detailed search criteria. Furthermore, by permitting LGBTQ women to remain invisible to straight users, OkCupid permits you to date online without masculine harassment. So go ahead, make a profile, and if you see mij feel free to tell mij I’m pretty.