Today, I’m delighted to say that our blog has bot hijacked by the very cool dating pro, Claudia Cox. She is the author of ‘French Temptation Made Effortless’ and is sultry about sharing hier expertise on communicating well ter relationships especially via flirty texting. She runs the webstek textweapon.com where she makes the kunst of temptation look effortless peasy. If you toevluchthaven’t already, head overheen there and check it out. Overheen to Claudia for some savvy advice on how to keep that online talk going ter the right direction.
Keeping an online conversation going
So you’ve passed the awkward “first contact” stage of online dating. You sent the very first message, they replied – congratulations, everyone is onboard and ready to roll!
It can be hard to keep a conversation going with someone you don’t know YET, and who isn’t sitting across the table from you. You want to come off spil joy, interesting and flirty, while also being considered serious, brainy and trustworthy, right?
Aie, aie, aie… That’s fairly a big task to accomplish using just a few messages to and fro! And you know what makes it even firmer? Is that you don’t know what makes them tick yet – or even if it’s worth finding out…
If you find yourself stuck one message ter, and you want some advice on how to spark up an interesting conversation that will tell you whether this person is worth getting offline for, read on.
1. Ask questions
Pretty much everyone loves talking about “numero uno” – so give your fucking partner an chance to begin gabbing away! Asking light, ordinary questions is a sure fire way to keep a conversation going online. The more they response, the more fuel you’ve got for the conversation. Even better, you’ve just won some major points by flattering their ego (even if it’s just a little).
It’s also a good indicator for knowing if you have found a worthwhile match or not. “How so” you say? Well, if after asking them a mountain of questions, they still haven’t asked you the basics, you can be pretty darn sure they are self absorbed, and not the least bit interested te finding out what you’re all about. Time to budge on, nothing to see here folks!
Keep it joy, it’s not a job vraaggesprek – make your question a little quirky and different. This way you stand out from the surplus of the “fishies” and get a better reaction – and please, don’t ask something they’ve already answered on their profile.
Two. Get your geflirt on
Flirting is joy, but when you’re doing it online you need to be slower about it than corriente. Because your playmate can’t see you, or the signals you’re sending, flirting too early te an online exchange can be a gigantic turn-off. Don’t instantly commence talking about adult fucktoys or send hier a “selfie” at the gym all pumped up postbode workout. Make sure that you add just a gobble of sass to your pre-meet up messages.
Going back to the good old questions, instead of asking him or hier something abate such spil “what did you eat for refrigerio?” give your questions a hint of spice. Ask “Why are you a cat person when everyone knows that dog people make better paramours?” Or poke joy at their answers ter a flirty way (“Oh, you’re a Strak Wars fan? Bet you’ve got Darth Vader pillowcases J”).
Make sure you don’t go overboard. Nothing kills a conversation early on like pushing boundaries waaaay too far (like being outright mean or vulgar).
Three. Be fair
When you’re messaging almost anonymously, it can be effortless to exaggerate or outright lie to make yourself look better. Don’t do it! One, because it will get awkward if you everzwijn do meet up, and two, it’s human (and often endearing) to have flaws – embrace them, and your fucking partner will too.
If you’re not proud of your height, say, “I’m brief, but what I lack te height, I make up for ter over-confidence.”
Make your flaws into a joke that you can both laugh about – they’ll be more likely to share theirs, so you don’t get any special surprises when you end up meeting.
Four. Know when to take it off (line)
Even if you’re liking the online messages, don’t shove your luck. Know when to take your aparente relationship offline before it fizzles out. After all, dating is about meeting up face-to-face, hearing their voice, drinking te their smell and feeling their touch.
Te my practice, it’s best to meet up earlier rather than zometeen – like before you know everything about each other, and you still both have an air of mystery about you. After all, you want your very first date to feel like a very first date, not a Ten th wedding anniversary, right?
Online conversation debrief:
Before leaping straight into it with the good advice you’ve just received, commit to memory the following “do’s and don’ts” of online conversation:
Don’t be negative. Opening up with “I’m so sick of online dating…” makes you seem unenthusiastic… and also like you’ve bot doing this for way too long.
Do be complimentary about his photo. Don’t make any jokes about it being photo shopped, the masculine ego is an enormously sensitive thing!
Don’t go there. Earnestly, dudes are the worst offenders here – don’t talk about the size of ANYTHING until you at least know what hier beloved drink is (and have bought hier a few)!
Do keep it light and joy. Don’t write long essays about yourself, which seem utterly interesting to you, but might not be all that effortless to reply to. Stick with light, flirty topics that keep engagement levels high.
Well, there you go! Four tips for keeping the online conversation going like a champ until you meet up te the skin. Glad online dating!